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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27371065">The Forest of Lost Souls</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/elenoremalfoy/pseuds/elenoremalfoy'>elenoremalfoy</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Blood Kink, But Really He's Apprentice Draco Malfoy, Choking Kink, Death Eater Draco Malfoy, Death Eater Theodore Nott, Draco Malfoy - Freeform, Draco Malfoy Kills People, Dubious Consent, Enemies to Lovers, Exhibitionism, F/M, Hate Sex, Inappropriate Use of Wandless Magic (Draco Malfoy), Knife Against Throat Kissing, Knifeplay, Lots Of Kinks Okay, Love Triangles, Multi, Professor Draco Malfoy, Slow Burn, Tell Me You Hate Me, Theodore Nott - Freeform, Theodore Nott Kills People Too, Top Draco Malfoy, Voyeurism, What Redemption Arc?, degradation kink</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-03</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 12:00:48</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>11,010</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27371065</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/elenoremalfoy/pseuds/elenoremalfoy</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Elenore Hail and The Forest of Lost Souls</p><p>(Draco Malfoy Enemies to Lovers) (Harry Potter Friends to Lovers to Enemies) (Hogwarts Apprentice AU)</p><p>“I for one don’t give a shit if you live or die, but for the sake of our oaths to Him,” Draco reached for her arm, the mark writhing under her sleeve in his grasp. “Never give anyone reason to doubt your loyalties. Ever. Because it’s not just your head they’ll come after. And if my status is spoiled because you’re a fucking prude, I’ll end you myself.”</p><p>Returning to Hogwarts as Slytherin Apprentices after their 7th year, Elenore Hail and Draco Malfoy have been tasked with infiltrating and bringing down the Order together. As if Nora doesn't have enough to deal with already as an apprentice, a spy for the Order, and the object of Harry Potter's affection...</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Draco Malfoy &amp; Original Female Character(s), Harry Potter &amp; Original Female Character(s)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>12</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. (Prologue) Lone, Lone, Lonely</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Suggested Soundtrack: Lorn- Acid Rain</p><p>"Secrecy flows through you, a different kind of blood." -Margaret Atwood, from Secrecy: Selected Poems II: 1976-1986</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Hail.” </p><p>Elenore started at the sound of his voice, nearly dropping the stack of books in her hand. She hadn’t heard him enter the room. Then again, she rarely ever did. </p><p>It was a skill of Draco’s that she has always envied. Admired him for it even. If one could admire a person so crass. Even still, in their line of work, stealth was extremely helpful. </p><p>Speaking of helpful— “Yes? Do you need something?” Nora could hardly contain her nerves. She started moving her things the muggle way from the old prefect dormitory to their new apprentice quarters. Curses. Of course, she would be expected to share a living space with Malfoy. </p><p>It had now been several days since the last meeting and she still hadn’t been assigned a task. Aside from helping Draco with his, whatever it was. He muttered something that sounded like desperate before he shut the door behind him, the air suddenly stiff with a seriousness she couldn’t place. </p><p>Another thing about him that she envied. He never gave away what he was thinking. It made perfect sense that, between the two of them, it had been him who was given the first task. Ever the Dark Lord’s favorite. Nonetheless, she was jealous.</p><p>He turned back, the greying daylight catching on a shadow beneath his eyes so violently that she sat the rest of the books down. Perhaps, jealous had not been the right word. </p><p>“You look like hell,” she said. </p><p>“You’re one to talk. You look like a mad woman.”</p><p>Nora scowled but glanced at herself in the mirror sideways. Truth be told, she did look a bit overwhelmed. Her hair looked like it’d been run through a few too many times and her robes from yesterday were still wrinkled from a restless bout of sleep. </p><p>“Mind your business, Malfoy.” She smoothed out her hair and made quick work of tucking in her sweater. “Anyways, you were going to tell me something?”</p><p>Draco cleared his throat, but did not look at her. Instead, he straightened the lapels of his blazer. “I’ve come to warn you about the feast tonight. In the great hall.” He had taken to watching the courtyard from a window. Empty as it was, save for the low laying clouds roiling about the cobble stone and open walls, it seemed to hold his attention a bit too well. </p><p>“It’s the first night back for students,” Nora said, coming to join him a healthy distance away. They had never been friends. Not growing up, and certainly not now. Not even in their current positions—the youngest death-eaters of their generation. But for the sake of both their lives, they could be allies. </p><p>“Trust me, Hail,” Draco began. She didn’t, not really. “There will be no celebrating tonight.”</p><p>Outside the clouds began to turn rotten with the slow-coming of night. She tried to remember what it was like to see it for the first time. Coming across that lake to see Hogwarts lit by nothing but the moon and lantern flame. The initial shock she must have experienced. The awe, the wonder, the glory. </p><p>It was forgotten to her now. Gone like the light from the courtyard, replaced by a fog that had been creeping into her mind for years. The same fog and fear that bound Draco and herself, an unfortunate tether between the two. </p><p>Although, it was the only thing they had in common. If he knew this or not, she couldn’t be sure. She certainly could never say it out loud. Not yet. Not until she knew his true intentions. Not until she knew who’s side he was really on. </p><p>“It will be better this way,” she told him. Then she added, “For us, don’t you think? Less pretending on our part.”</p><p>Nora felt him glance at her, but she did not meet his stare. She didn’t need to. She knew enough about him to know it would be cold and blank and void of anything for her to interpret. </p><p>Instead, she let him decide where they would stand with one another during their time as apprentices together.</p><p>“There is no us.” His voice was quiet, but had lost its soft edge. She bit her tongue, and continued to watch the black sky roll in. “I have my tasks and you have yours. Stay out of my way and I’ll do the same.”</p><p>When it seemed too much time had passed for more conversation, that this would be the end of it, he started again. “I for one don’t give a shit if you live or die, but for the sake of our oaths to Him,” Draco reached for her arm, the mark writhing under her sleeve in his grasp. “Never give anyone reason to doubt your loyalties. Ever. Because it’s not just your head they’ll come after. And if my status is spoiled because you’re a fucking prude, I’ll end you myself.”</p><p>She was silent for a spell, unsure at first how to respond. Then, it occurred to her that he could be referring to where her true loyalties lie. She risked a glance in his direction and—just as she suspected—his expression gave away nothing she could use to read between his lines.</p><p>Nora figured he knew as much, because those vacant eyes never faltered. Not once. </p><p>It was clear that it would be a very, very lonely year.</p><p>“What about yourself, Malfoy?” She withdrew her arm and settled for hiding her nerves behind a laugh. It carried as much charm as a snake’s might, but she knew that’s exactly what he’d be expecting from her. He who thought he knew her so well. He didn’t, not really. “Pretending to be who everyone thinks you are will no doubt get you killed.”</p><p>“I don’t have to pretend,” Draco said. She watched his figure retreating through the reflection of twilight in the window, the arriving night swallowing him whole. “I’m much worse than what everyone thinks of me.”</p><p>With nothing else to be said, he was gone. Left alone and utterly starless, she sighed and forced her chin upwards.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Missing, Missing, Missing</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Suggested Soundtrack: The Neighbourhood- Afraid</p><p>"There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so." -William Shakespeare, Hamlet</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Looking around the Great Hall, she realized that Draco had been telling the truth. All of the air in the room had been sucked out, leaving the atmosphere too tight. Too silent. No one made a move to say anything, including Nora— no, least of all Nora. </p><p>Dumbledore’s announcement was still settling with most of the room. A lot of the students and other apprentices appeared confused. Though she’d heard him perfectly clear, Nora tried mirroring their expressions. </p><p>Hogwarts’ first attack had come before the sorting ceremony ever started. An entire carriage of straggling seventh years had gone missing. When it was discovered by Snape—of course, it had been Snape—the carriage was abandoned and the students were no where to be found. </p><p>The blood rushing in her ears slowed. Missing, missing, missing, it seemed to hiss.</p><p>Several professors were still scouring the grounds and likely would be long into the night. They wouldn’t find anything, though. No, the dark lord was smarter than that. He was meticulous and never did anything without purpose. He wouldn’t give himself away so easily, so soon.</p><p>“I forgot to mention earlier,” Draco said, smugness making him insufferably annoying. Even more so than usual. “The dark lord has found use for students wandering too near the forbidden forest. You’ll understand I’m not permitted to share anymore than that.”  </p><p>“If you’re the only one the dark lord shares anything with, why initiate me at all? Other than tolerating you, what the hell else is expected of me?” </p><p>“Bitching,” he said, as if it were obvious. “Merlin knows there’s not much else you’re good for.”</p><p>Nora shot him a withering glare and there, on his face, was nothing. Not a trace of what he’d just said. The bastard had it too easy. She crossed her arms, hoping to smother the reminder of the dark mark beneath her sleeve. 	</p><p>Beside her, Draco made a sound of amusement. Or annoyance. Nora didn’t care nearly enough to deliberate. She was far too busy schooling her features to match the rest of the professors’ in attendance. Worried for the children lost, yet confident that the situation was under control. </p><p>In the way that Nora supposed only he could, Dumbledore assured the students that an investigation was well underway. Then he warned them that the forbidden forest was just that. Forbidden, as it always has been. After all, with Voldemort back, darkness was lurking about. Seeking to penetrate the castle walls at any opportunity it might find.</p><p>As far as precautions go, professors, apprentices, and prefects would take shifts monitoring the corridors. All students must follow the mandatory curfew, anyone caught out of bed after hours will answer to the headmaster himself. More of the same, really.</p><p>“Looks like we’ll be seeing more of each other than you’d hoped,” she said to Draco, hoping to return the annoyance because he was Draco, and she was entirely required to do so. “Lucky me.”</p><p>He bent low enough that the words brushed past the shell of her ear, “Lucky you.” </p><p>Out of disgust, Nora turned to sneer at him for invading her very personal space, but too quickly she caught the look on his face.</p><p>Draco wore the briefest of expressions. So fleeting that she’d almost missed it, but— she hadn’t. He looked as if he were seeing through her, past whatever mask she’d drawn up for the moment. It was dark in their corner of the great hall. Though not yet dark enough for her to misjudge the linger in his stare.</p><p>Nora knew better than to think he were flirting, but fucks sake, there truly was no keeping the blush from blooming across her cheeks. She felt caught.</p><p>When he finally met her eyes, he drew back lazily, refusing to acknowledge anything had passed between them. He resumed his brooding stance against the wall, at once falling into himself and becoming every awful thing people thought of him. She realized very easily that it was an accident she’d seen any of it at all.</p><p>Right then. She tried slipping back into herself as well, but the lines between which apprentice she should pretend at being were starting to blur. From exhaustion, no doubt. She was well over due for a nap. Stepping out of their shadows, she straightened out her robes. </p><p>“Piss off already.”</p><p>“Choke,” she replied in earnest. </p><p>And then she was off to the apprentice’s quarters to crawl into the comfort of her duvet. Quickly making her way to the dungeons, she visibly sighed at the thought of collapsing behind her closed door. Instead of taking the stairs down towards the Slytherin dormitories, she turned and took the stairs up to their quarters. </p><p>The sound of feet echoed through the well. Her own and a ghost’s half a heartbeat later. Nora’s chest sank, but she wound her way around the looming steps faster. When she felt a good distance away from the chasing foot falls, she slipped into the shadows and waited. It wouldn’t be long. </p><p>Just as she had anticipated, nothing save for his unmistakable scent—fresh rain and chocolate and something else, something so inherently him—and those ratted shoes of his peaking out from under the invisibility cloak. Despite herself, Nora felt the corner of her mouth twitch.</p><p>In those last few steps before he reached her hiding place, she had meant to jump out and scare him. As she’d done many a time over the years that they’d been friends. It’d been a while since he’d snuck by with that cloak of his, but she didn’t blame him. In fact, she’d been relieved last year when he’d told her he had too much else to worry about. After all, so did she. </p><p>Circumstances what they were, she had meant to jump out and scare him, but hesitated a moment too long in her own thoughts. Harry had slipped the cloak up and over her quicker than she could register what had happened. They stumbled a bit, but hands in the right crooks of each other’s arms steadied them in no time at all and—</p><p>“Harry!”</p><p>“Elle.” </p><p>Nora forgot to cringe. She’d never preferred that shortening of her name. Except, of course, when Harry was saying it. It had always sounded too soft coming from anyone else, but with Harry, being soft never felt like an insult. Which is probably why she collapsed into him instead of her perfectly good bed upstairs. “I’ve missed you.”</p><p>“I know,” he said. He was warm and solid and held her against him much like a boy pretending at being a gentleman might. “I’m sorry.” </p><p>“Don’t be,” she mumbled into his shoulder sleeve. To hell with how fragile she may look. </p><p>“I don’t know how not to be,” he told her. She laughed because she knew it were true. “I feel like I’m putting you in danger by letting you do this for the order. For us. You already seem so exhausted.”</p><p>“Harry,” Nora pulled back to really look at him. Tousled hair, honest green eyes, and a blooded nose. Why was he always covered in blood? “I chose the order. You are not responsible for me or my choices. No matter how absolutely mad they are.”</p><p>Now it was Harry’s turn to laugh. He was an awkward, troubled soul and his laugh was a quiet, pleading sound. “You’ve always been mad.” </p><p>“Who’s handy work would that be?” Nora looked pointedly at his nose. </p><p>“Malfoy’s,” he said. Nora nodded, the spell to repair it tumbling out flawlessly. She could tell there was so much more he was struggling with saying, but she didn’t try to pressure him. </p><p>Not now when he was here and holding her like he’d done a thousand times before. Before the world went to shit around them. Not here, though. Under his cloak of invisibility, they could still just be Harry and Elle, just two friends that—had kissed once or twice, she reminded herself. Maybe three times. Damn you, Harry.</p><p>“Elle,” he said. His seriousness was one she could place. One she knew all too well. </p><p>“I’m sorry,” she began, silently cursing her voice for cutting out. “What were you saying?”</p><p>In what would seem like only a small act of bravery for anyone else, but was surely quite the feat for someone as shy as Harry, he ducked so that his forehead rested on hers. Their noses brushed comfortably against one another. “I said,” he breathed, those seeking hands finding her waist. “That I would feel entirely responsible if something were to happen to you.”</p><p>“You shouldn’t.” She didn’t know if she were referring to what he’d confessed or the fact that he was leaning farther into her. They were sharing breaths now, the rim of his glasses cold against her cheek.</p><p>“I would,” he said. “You know I would.” His eyes fluttered shut and just as she closed the gap between their mouths, she heard them again. Footsteps. Seven fucks, she groaned.</p><p>“Harry,” Nora broke away quickly. “Harry, Malfoy’s coming.”</p><p>“Bloody hell, Elle.” Harry, his eyes still closed, looked as if he were half-shattered. He made quick work of turning her to face the wall, his body pressing in behind hers. “Making your little noises.” The words were said as a sigh into the back of her neck. “Here I thought you must’ve really missed me.” </p><p>She went blood red and tried to respond, knowing very well nothing intelligent would come from the attempt. Not that it mattered, because as soon as she opened her mouth, Harry’s hand shot out to cover it. Shhh, he hissed with his fingers smothering any other noises she might have made. </p><p>Draco was drawing nearer with each thud of her heart against the stone wall. She hoped it was inaudible to all present company. Otherwise, the stupid thing was bound to get her into only the most humiliating of predicaments. </p><p>Another thud and there he was, a passing shadow on the wall above her. Waiting for him to disappear the rest of the way up the stairs, she noticed the fading shadow doubling back. She turned  to find Draco looking over his shoulder, staring hard in their direction. Harry tensed and she absently noted that he’d started holding his breath at some point. </p><p>For a moment Nora worried Draco must have heard them, but then his gaze was slipping over the entire stair well. Searching for the source of wrongness about the air. She saw his features twist with confusion and relax in their usually cruel set. Unable to contain the tingle of excitement that came with evading his scrutiny, she smiled wickedly. </p><p>As if sensing her pride about it, Draco scowled and resumed his path to their quarters. There was a muttering from around the bend of the well, their password adsum adsum. I am here, I am here. Stone scraping against stone. After another sequence of thud, thud, thuds, silence at last.</p><p>Nora allowed herself air just after Harry, both of them deciding that suffocating under an invisibility cloak would definitely put a damper on their efforts to save the wizarding world. She bit at his hand, laughing when he drew it back as she faced him again.</p><p>“Nice work, Potter,” she said. </p><p>“Yeah, brilliant,” Harry replied flatly. “We were nearly caught.”</p><p>“You liked it.”</p><p>It was clear he did not find it as funny as she had. He was already beginning to sort himself back out. Adjusting his glasses, attempting rather poorly at straightening his tie. She sighed. Leave it to Malfoy to ruin her fun.</p><p>“Ha—”</p><p>“No, Elle, let me.” He cut her off far too quickly for her liking. “I only came to tell you about the army’s first meeting of the year. Hermione’s arranged for a few new students to meet us at Hog’s Head and…well, she’s said that it might be better if you just ensure that Malfoy stays as far away from that side of Hogsmead as possible.”</p><p>Nora wanted to point out that rekindling Dumbledore’s Army was her idea in the first place, but she did not. He knew what it meant to ask her something like this. When she said nothing in return, Harry added clumsily, “At least, just for now while we get things going that is.”</p><p>Nora hid the blow to her ego the best she could. Sure, she’d wanted a mission, but not something this lowly. Keeping Malfoy busy while the rest of them got to find new recruits and rebuild their army. </p><p>“Right,” she said. “Well, leave that bit to me then.”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Adsum, Adsum, Adsum</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Suggested Soundtrack: Soap&amp;Skin- Me and The Devil</p><p>"I exist, that is all, and I find it nauseating." -Jean-Paul Sartre, Being and Nothingness</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Adsum, adsum, she whispered to the wall. </p><p>Albeit, a few stray stones began moving before the phrase ever fully left her mouth. As though awaiting her arrival, they fell away quickly to reveal a weathered door. Past it and beyond their sensibly decorated living room, as if he too were waiting, stood Draco by the window.</p><p>Sulking, as always. Nora could hardly say she was surprised. “Malfoy,” she said. </p><p>“Is that you, Hail?” </p><p>“Who else?” Nora replied cooly, her fingers making quick work of removing her tie. Already she felt the ice thinning beneath her. Another thing she hated him for. He was entirely too observant for her liking.</p><p>“You tell me.” Draco moved away from the window and took a seat in the leather chair beside their hearth. He waved a hand to the steaming kettle across the way. Upon his silent request, the kettle found an empty cup, drew him tea, and settled back on the stovetop. “Nothing? No matter. Come and sit anyway.” </p><p>She laughed once and bitterly. “No, thank you.”</p><p>“You think I didn’t notice you in the stairwell?” </p><p>Nora stopped the pursuit to her room and spun to face him. “You think I’d care even if you had? What I do in stairwells is none of your business.” </p><p>He tsked, so obviously enjoying himself. “See, that’s where you’re wrong.” A few hours in and he already had something over her. So he thought. “What you do becomes my business when what or rather who you’re doing could jeopardize everything I’m working for.”</p><p>“Everything we are working for,” she hissed. </p><p>“Don’t pretend like you haven’t just been caught.” On the table next to him, Draco’s cup rattled. She hoped it would spew. Let it. Merlin knows the tension in the room was sure about to. “I know about your history with Potter. How do you think the dark lord will feel about your current affair when I tell him what I know?” </p><p>“Just what is it you think you’ve caught me doing, Malfoy?” Nora’s courage was spilling over, carrying her into the sitting room. “Let me be very clear about one thing, you ignorant ass. Every single thing I do is for the Dark Lord. As if I’d dare let Potter touch me if it weren’t for my oaths to Him. Use your bloody head. I’m getting close to him for information.”</p><p>Draco was quiet for a moment, taking a sip from his steaming cup. He licked his teeth and laughed, something wickedly amusing occurring to him. “Whoring yourself out to Potter? What a way to restore your family’s traitorous name.”</p><p>It was not shame that brought her face down to his. “You want to have a go at fathers, do you?” No, she wasn’t ashamed of her father’s betrayal to the dark lord all those years ago. Especially not in front of a Malfoy. “Let us start by discussing the details of your father’s trial. Go on then, son of the ever faithful Lucius Malfoy. Try me.”</p><p>“We’re done here,” he said, ready to rise from his seat. </p><p>“Not quite yet.” Nora placed both hands on either arms of the chair. “Just because I’m not breaking his nose does not make me any less loyal than you.” </p><p>“You can’t say he didn’t deserve it.” Draco was daring her. Angling his head to match her boldness. “Obviously, it wasn’t enough to teach him his place. I wouldn’t put it past him to be eavesdropping right this very moment.”</p><p>“He’s not,” she said. Harry was long gone. He’d run off from her as quick as he’d came.</p><p>“Lucky you, after all,” he repeated their earlier words. “What do you suppose your little boyfriend would say if he could hear you now?”</p><p>“Damn what Potter thinks.” She could see her reflection in his ill mannered eyes. Her wild expression framed by the flames of the hearth at her back. “Say what you like about the way I do things. In the end, you know we’re both just trying to repair what our fathers have done and honor our family names.”</p><p>Draco raised an already arched brow. “I suppose you would let me believe the only difference between you and I is initiative. Let me guess, I had it easy because I was given my task. So naturally, you think you must be better than me because even without a mission you’re so eager to please?”</p><p>“I’ve got a better idea for you, Hail. Ditch Potter and suck the dark lord off instead,” he spat. “Least your efforts shall not go unnoticed.” </p><p>She let him rise this time and watched him storm off to his room, kettle and cup in tow. The slam of his door rattled their quarters entirely, but did nothing to hide the ‘desperate fucking whore’ he’d shouted over the rumble.</p><p>“I heard that!” She stalked off towards her room, hand on the lock when a terrible thought stopped her. Ignoring the part of herself that cautioned against it, she drew her wand from its place at her hip and sent a charm through his shut door. </p><p>“Meteolo jinx.”</p><p>For a second she worried he’d already drawn up wards, but then there it was. An awful crack of thunder, a flash of lightning so bright it shone through every crack in the wooden door, and then the howl of a storm following after.</p><p>Nora heard a roaring stupid bitch, and quickly ducked into her room. She wasted no time placing wards around her room. If Draco wanted to seek revenge, he’d have to spend a lot more time breaking through her protective charms than she knew him to be willing. </p><p>Alone at last, in the comfort of her private chambers, Nora fell gracelessly facedown onto her bed. Hours passed, but she lie awake, shoes still dangling off her bedside. Craning her neck to the side, she noticed at some point in the night, it started to rain. ‘Missing, missing, missing,’ whispered the storm against her window.</p><p>Morning came all too quickly. By the time it did, Nora had just fallen asleep. It was a terrible habit of hers. Thinking herself to sleep, only to toss fitfully for an hour or three until it was time to wake. She did so grumpily, glaring at the rays of light creeping across her room.</p><p>“Curses,” she muttered, already on her way to the kitchenette. “All of them.”</p><p>Coffee. Yes, that was all she needed. It must have heard her stomping through the space, because the kettle was pouring her a fresh cup when she entered. A glorious little kettle. Nora knew they would be fast friends. </p><p>“Poor kettle.” Nora set it back on the warmer and took a short sip from her mug. “I promise to treat you better than that snoring oaf next door.” </p><p>The kettle, of course, said nothing back. It’s charms were simply that. Just charms. The kettle felt no more connection to her than a book might to its reader. Slightly offended, Nora sighed. She took a longer sip this time, her toes stretching out across the wooden floors. </p><p>“Were you just talking to the kettle?” </p><p>“Cauldron boil me!” Nora nearly jumped out of her skin. The idea sounded much more appealing than sharing the rest of her mornings with his miserable company.</p><p>It didn’t matter that they’d shared quarters last year as head boy and girl. She’d never get used to his silent entries.</p><p>“Are those yesterday’s clothes?”</p><p>“No,” she pinched the bridge of her nose. “No, no, no!” </p><p>Turning though she instantly regretted it, her day somehow worsened despite just starting. She fixed that glare from earlier on Draco. He stood slouched from slumber in a jumper too large for him, rumpled briefs, and bare feet. She shook her head. Something about his knees bothered her. </p><p>“He could have chosen anyone else for this mission. Blaise, Pansy, literally anyone—“</p><p>“You think you’ve got it bad?” Draco was saying as she crossed to their bathroom. “I’d much rather have Blaise or Pansy. Instead I’m forced to look at—”</p><p>“Up yours, Malfoy,” Nora said, one hand up to cut off the rest of his insults. She was thinking that it was entirely too early for this when his hand clasped around her raised wrist. </p><p>She sputtered to a stop, coffee sloshing everywhere, and opened her mouth to hex him sideways. His face was very near her hand and damn her if she didn’t try wrenching it out for an attempt at a decent slap. Alas, she settled for something like a growl. </p><p>“Scared, Hail?” Up close, he was devastating. Grey eyes simmering, boiling to silver as she watched. Cruel mouth twisting into a sneer.</p><p>“Of course I am,” she told him honestly. “You’re absolutely hideous at this range.”</p><p>He ignored her. “Don’t think for a second you won’t pay for your little trick last night. You’re playing a dangerous game with Potter already. One toe out of line and I’ll—”</p><p>“End me yourself,” she reminded him, shaking out her wrist. “Yes, the idea is growing on me.”</p><p>Without touching it, Nora let the bathroom door slam behind her. It shook dust from the castle walls. Pleased, she smiled behind the edge of her mug. Though, her contentment was cut short when she looked in the mirror. Much to her dismay, he’d been right again. She looked ghastly. </p><p>Just as she was about to turn away, too startled by the vacancy in her own eyes, Nora started choking on a mouth full of dirt. The hot liquid she had sipped was now rotting to mud as she swallowed. Draco had soiled her morning coffee. </p><p>She scrambled to the sink to rinse out the rest of the dirt she hadn’t yet spit to the ground. Blindly, she searched for her toothbrush as hate began roiling in her stomach. Watching the mess wash down the drain, she decided then that Draco Malfoy would suffer. At her hands, no less.</p>
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<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Cross, Cross, Crossing</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Suggested Soundtrack: Arctic Monkeys-Do I wanna know? </p><p>"I'm attracted to things that I can't define." -Raf Simons</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Professor Slughorn.” Nora entered class two hours early looking and feeling much more awake. She found the professor finishing up a few potions at the front. “Elenore Hail, it’s nice to meet you.”</p><p>“Ah yes, Miss Hail,” Slughorn smiled. He seemed friendly enough. “Here, come around! Come have a look. See what we have planned for today’s class.” </p><p>“Please, sir, call me Nora.” She assumed the first day would be nothing more than an introduction to the subject and jotting down a bunch of notes. That’s how Snape had always started anyways. Though, as she came round to the table, it was clear that would not be the case. </p><p>“You’ve really outdone yourself, professor.” Several potions caught her eye, but the few dangerous ones she noticed and named instantly stole her undivided attention. “Felix Felicis, veritaserum, amortentia. We’re going over all of these in the first lesson?”</p><p>“Ah, yes!” The professor appeared greatly satisfied. “Dumbledore promised me an apprentice advanced in the art of potion making. I’m glad to see him proved an honest man.” </p><p>“Dumbledore said that?” Nora smiled, leaning over the amortentia potion. She’d smelled it once before in one of her earlier years at Hogwarts, but somehow it was different now. Where it had once been a warm, cozy fragrance, she now smelled something…</p><p>“Intoxicating, isn’t it!” Slughorn’s laugh rumbled from beside her. </p><p>“I’ve always envied people who can note what they smell perfectly,” she admitted, head still half-buried the cauldron. </p><p>“Oh, don’t let that get to you, my dear. Not everyone smells just any one thing. Some have also been known to change, to tailor itself to the witch or wizard’s level of maturity reached. You see—”</p><p>“So you mean, as I grow older…”</p><p>“Yes, yes! As you grow older, you grow all the wiser.”</p><p>“Don’t flatter her too much, professor.” Her head snapped up. She wasn’t sure how long they’d been there, but Harry and Ron were leaning comfortably against the doorframe. It was Ron who spoke first. “It will go straight to her head, that one. She’s given Snape a run for his galleons in potions, you know?”</p><p>“Is that—” Slughorn broke off, adjusting his glasses to see the boys better. </p><p>“Allow me, sir,” Nora left the table to introduce the boys. “This is Harry Potter and his accomplice Ronald Weasley.”</p><p>“Harry Potter,” the professor repeated. Slughorn was staring at Harry the way most everyone did upon meeting him for the first time. In total awe of ‘the boy who lived.’ Or rather, Harry’s personal favorite, ‘the chosen one.’</p><p>“Nice to meet you, professor,” Harry took and dropped his hand a bit too hastily. “Although, I’m afraid we can’t stay to chat. Dumbledore has asked us all to watch in on the defense against the dark arts lecture. It’s the professor’s first time teaching the subject, and…and well—”</p><p>Creeping nostalgia made Nora’s chest ache. Even still, she was fighting a grin. Harry was a terrible liar. Sputtering like an idiot, Ron half pushing them all out of the room. For a moment everything felt so normal that she had to laugh.</p><p>“I’ll be back before class, professor,” she assured him, ushering the boys out herself. </p><p>“No, rush, dear Nora! See you soon.” </p><p>As per usual, Harry and Ron were racing through the castle. She glanced at a clock in passing. They were already five minutes late, and it would take another five to reach the other side of the—Nora was thrown off guard when Harry caught her arm. </p><p>“Dumbledore hasn’t asked us to look in on Snape’s first lecture.” Harry said, never stopping for her to catch up. She dragged awkwardly behind a few too many paces than she cared to admit. “I just have a feeling that if we know what he’s teaching his classes, then we’ll know what we should be prepared for.”</p><p>“I don’t suppose you could’ve warned me ahead of time?” She shook free, suddenly worried he might feel the mark there slithering beneath her sweater. </p><p>“I meant to tell you last night,” he said tightly. “I just got distracted, I suppose.” </p><p>“Distracted?” Ron glanced between them both, oblivious as always. “By what?”</p><p>Nora looked to Harry, who refused to meet her eyes as he said, “Nothing. Just slipped my mind is all. Happens to everyone, Ronald.”</p><p>It was good enough for Ron. He turned saying, “Yeah, happens to everyone. Even boy wonder.” </p><p>Though, if Ron had looked back there would have been no mistaking the fall of her face, eyebrows furrowing in confusion. She hadn’t realized Harry was so embarrassed of her and their…their friendship?  No, that wasn’t the right word at all anymore. What ever it was, they had crossed a line last night. </p><p>Harry’s fingers returned to hers, his knuckles grazing her own as they walked in stride with one another. Nora watched as he intertwined them for a brief squeeze, or what felt to her like an apology. She returned it before releasing him. Maybe they had crossed that line long ago. </p><p>“Elle,” Harry tried.</p><p>“Harry, don’t, “ she whispered back, ice making her pride shiver. “As you said, it’s nothing.”</p><p>That was the last of their conversation before they entered Snape’s lecture. Nora knew from the pause in his voice that Snape was aware of their presence even with his back turned. They shuffled in, finding a back wall to lean against as the professor continued. </p><p>“The mind is not a book, to be opened at will and examined at leisure. Thoughts are not etched on the inside of skulls, to be perused by any invader.” Snape turned, lifting a hand to someone across the room. </p><p>“Mr. Malfoy, why don’t you teach our guests a little about Legilimency while they’re here?” Snape met their eyes from across the room. “I’m sure they could all stand to learn a thing or two about the subject from someone as skilled at it as yourself.” </p><p>“Certainly, professor.” He emerged from the crowd of students at the front, directing that shit eating grin towards someone other than herself this time. </p><p>“The mind is a complex and many-layered thing, Potter. Or at least most minds are…”A few students giggled, and she felt Harry stiffen beside her. “It is true, however, that those who have mastered Legilimency are able, under certain conditions, to delve into the minds of their victims and to interpret their findings correctly.”</p><p>“Very good, Mr. Malfoy,” said Snape. “Now, can anyone tell my what the opposite of Legilimency is? Does anyone here know?”</p><p>“Occlumency, sir.” Nora responded before she even realized she knew the answer. After hearing herself say it, she distantly recalled reading something about it once. “It is a rare branch of magic used as a shield against the invasion and influence of a Legilimens. To prevent them from accessing one’s thoughts and feelings, or worse— influencing them.” </p><p>“And here I thought, Miss Hail, that your speciality lie in potions.” Hearing that coming from Snape almost made her laugh. She didn’t though. Best not to upset him any further. “Anyone who practices the art is know as an Occlumens. It is a useful skill when defending oneself against the dark arts of a Legilimens.” </p><p>Then, catching them all by surprise, “Shall we perform an example? Do I have any volunteers?” As expected, no one came forward. Nora sank back into the wall, Draco took to writing out terms on the board behind him, and Harry was focusing very intently on a far corner of the room.</p><p>“A fine idea, Mr. Weasley,” Snape began. Ron jolted from his thoughts, clueless as ever. “Miss Hail, Mr. Malfoy. To the front, if you will. Class, our two distinguished Hogwarts apprentices will now demonstrate, as they have both proven themselves to be so knowledgeable about today’s lesson.”</p><p>Nora glared at Ron, about to protest when Draco beat her to it. “Sir, may I suggest a different—”</p><p>“You may not,” Snape said. </p><p>Slowly, so as not to offset the professor’s chilling temper, Nora made her way to the front. When they joined the class, she’d forgotten to notice the students in attendance. She felt their presence now, all watching as she stood opposite from Draco. </p><p>He withdrew his wand, and prepared to preform Legilimens. Nora, pushing down her nerves, called on a nearby chair to seat herself in. It came at once. Students were already whispering about the simplest wandless spell. Bitterly, she considered what they would think of their performance.</p><p>Draco held his wand at the ready, reminding her of a duel she’d watched between he and Harry years ago. He dropped the hand, the memory going with it, and tilted his head. Everything about the action so frustratingly vile. </p><p>She closed her eyes and waited, thinking of nothing. Nothing, nothing, nothing. Sitting. She was sitting. Sitting and waiting, waiting, waiting. Why wasn’t anything happening? Had he started? Was she doing it? Was she blocking him out? The thought briefly crossed her mind to open her eyes, when suddenly—</p><p>“Now, Mr. Malfoy,” came Snape’s voice from behind her.</p><p>Whatever had been said after was drowned out by the sound of her own thoughts. They were so violently loud she might as well have been shouting them. The occasional curse to Draco’s name and a very repetitive ‘Get out! Get out!’ She felt like screaming. Hell, she probably was.</p><p>Then what memory appeared as a sliver, nothing more than a reminder returning to some small corner in the back of her mind, soared towards the front of her head at an achingly fast pace. It played on the back of her eyelids like it were happening for the first time again. </p><p>Harry leading her by the hand the night of their first kiss. His palm was slightly sweaty from nerves and far too many butterbeers, but she let him guide her to the corner booth in three broomsticks. The scene melted away and she was seeing their hands finding each other yet again. This time in secret, behind Ron’s back, crossing lines. </p><p>Enough, she told Draco. Nora felt him toss it away carelessly. He was looking for something now. His rummaging around in her mind was a torture she had never known. Constantly fighting to keep everything locked away, obstructing his search at every turn. </p><p>She felt him wandering a bit farther back, too far. He was starting to pull at the threads she began weaving the moment he entered her mind. There were some things she didn’t mind if he saw. Things she’d rather him not, but wouldn’t mind if he did. However, there were other things. </p><p>He’d been picking at a loose thread, a stubborn end she’d tied at least three times already, when a wisp floated by. She shot out for it, tucking it back to where it came from, but it was too late. Draco held a piece, ripped and blurry from her efforts. ‘Desperate fucking whore,’ it muttered. </p><p>It was him, of course. The details were lost, but the pale hair and vile words were telling enough. He was slamming the door to his room, the pissy outline of kettle following him. Walking past her in a stairwell, his neck straining from pretending he couldn’t hear Potter’s thoughts. </p><p>Another memory, this one too waining for either of them to grasp, but she could just make out the background of his manor. Distantly, she thought she heard a scream. She guessed he must’ve recognized this memory. After all, it was one of his own as well. The day they were both initiated. </p><p>Something soured in her head, and she knew without knowing that it was Draco’s mood. Apparently, he was not finding this fun anymore. Good, she said. Piss off already. A twitch, a shove, and then she had him, his magic in her teeth and she spit him out. It was a sloppy plan and poorly executed, but it got them both out of her mind. </p><p>Back in front of the class, they stared at each other for a moment too long. Breathless, Draco had no time to react. No time to recognize the look of sheer and unadulterated spite. Her wand was out and firing at him before anyone ever even saw her move.</p>
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<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Wise, Wise, Wiser</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Suggested Soundtrack: Biting Down- Lorde</p><p>"The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, and wiser people so full of doubts." -Bertrand Russell</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>‘Nor, Nor, Nora,’ he said upon her very abrupt entrance into his mind. ‘What a very grave mistake you’ve just made.’</p><p>Nora bristled at his use of her name, echoes cutting off vowels at the end. It’s certainly not the first time she’s heard him refer to her as anything besides Hail. She was just expecting something a bit more spiteful like his familiar ‘stupid fucking bitch.’ Biting her cheek, she began scouring about anyways. </p><p>The inside of Draco’s mind was more or less an inward reflection of his sulking persona. It was a dark and hollow place. This came as no surprise to Nora. A bitter chill told her he heard that. She was glad for it. </p><p>Shucking off the cold, she went back to focusing on the task at hand. Or rather, mind. She didn’t dare think about what it was she was looking for. No need to tip him off before she got what she wanted. </p><p>This place was a labyrinth all on its own. He needn’t go about mucking it up for the worse. Not on her account anyways. Not while she was up here. She didn’t care what the fuck he did with his own head when she weren’t in it.</p><p>There, in the corner. She raced towards it. Despite the fact that it felt like wading in the water of the black lake, she trudged on, hands outstretched and damn near close to reaching it. </p><p>‘Ah, ah, ah,’ Draco sighed, jerking it into the shadows. In his head, his voice was a hiss, a caress she had to rub away with the shoulder of her sweater. He heard that, too. </p><p>She supposed it was luck or something like it— she’d have to find a word dark enough to fit these conveniences if they kept occurring. Supposed it was something like luck again because a thought was crossing his mind soon after. A flash of smoke passing right above her.</p><p>Her hand was a shot in the dark, ripping a piece of remembering from the underbelly of a racing memory flying overhead. It was silvery and evading her grasp even as she held it against herself. The words of some Gryffindor needled their way out from her mind or his, she wasn’t sure. </p><p>‘It’s like trying to catch smoke. Like trying to catch smoke with your bare hands.’</p><p>‘Get out. Get the fuck out.’ He was ordering her now, which was almost effective. Almost and yet, not quite. She couldn’t help that the corners of her mouth snaked upwards the way they did. Victory rendered her entirely helpless in the matter— it was sweet that way, victory. </p><p>‘Elle. Elle. Ellie.’ Nora went cold at once as Harry’s voice rose from her closed palms. It wrapped an icy tendril around her wrist. </p><p>Realizing what she caught, she tried tossing it back. Much to her dismay, it clung to her like a second skin. In a panic, she tried washing it off in the stream of consciousness at her ankles, but the water had apparently and very conveniently run dry. </p><p>‘Fuck you,’ she thought loudly. Though, he was suddenly thinking even louder. Shoving the piece down her throat. Attempting to smother her with it. Blanketing her with in until her flailing arms were trapped under it, under Harry’s invisibility cloak. </p><p>It was dark, she was alone, and then Draco was in the stairwell, headed for his room. It was empty, not another soul in sight. Yet, somehow his thoughts were not his own. They were filled to the brim with images of Nor— Elle. Ellie, as Potter so liked to call her in his fantasies. </p><p>Potter’s very mild, very pleasant fantasies in which he was a perfect gentleman and she was a well-mannered lady. Nothing like any fantasy Draco was familiar with. Stunned to silence, he continued wordlessly upwards.</p><p>Potter was thinking how he enjoyed Ellie against him like this. Close enough that he could feel her heart beating in time with his. Potter was also thinking about how he wished he could take her back to Gryffindor with him. </p><p>To his room, but oddly enough, not in the way Draco or Nora herself assumed at first hearing this. No, Potter wished he could take her with him, if only so that she didn’t have to live in such close quarters with Draco. With a death eater. </p><p>Draco almost laughed as he passed by them. It was pity Potter was consumed with. Pity as pure and thick as honey. His poor Ellie, subjected to such torture. Potter risked pulling her a bit closer to him as Draco wound up the rest of the way to their quarters. </p><p>Then, of course, Draco was doubling back to listen for her thoughts, too. He was curious and she was there with something to hide, so why not. Terrible reasoning on his part. An even worse idea. </p><p>His discovery was pathetic and raunchy. Nora was thinking how she enjoyed being held against Potter like this. Close enough that she could feel his growing desire. She was also thinking about how she wished he would take her back to his room. </p><p>In exactly the way Draco had assumed she would be. He just knew it, could tell it about her even past that bookish facade she paraded around behind. No worse than Granger, really. </p><p>He scowled, cutting himself off just as she wished Potter would slide that free hand of his under the hem of her skirt. The hand that wasn’t currently clamped a bit roughly around her mouth. </p><p>Oh yes, he heard how fond she was of the position. She was never more disgusting to him than right then, her thoughts volatile and overwatered with Potter. Somehow everything and nothing Draco expected of her. </p><p>Mildly disappointed with her judgment, he wondered if she had any idea how much she was risking for…something Potter would surely never give her. Not in the way she wanted, was so fucking desperate for. </p><p>He left after a moment, the irony of the couples’ thoughts providing him with enough amusement for the night. Well, that and the satisfaction of imagining her writhing under the Dark Lord’s cruciatus curse after informing him of what he just stumbled upon. </p><p>The scene faded at her own whim and they were both back in the front of the class room. Nora’s wand clattered to the ground seconds before an insult—something truly hateful—could leave her mouth. His was opening as well. Both ready to lunge for the other. Both too stunned to actually do so. </p><p>What good it would do either of them now, in the presence of their students and professors. </p><p>“A very well preformed example from you both,” Snape said. Nora didn’t realize he’d seized her wand, but he was holding it out to her now. She took it silently, the  hilt burning a hole through her palm the moment they met. </p><p>“My pleasure, professor.” Draco’s voice was even, but she could see him clutching his own wand so hard that his knuckles were whiter than usual. Which meant she wasn’t the only one struggling with pocketing the damn thing. </p><p>Later then, she promised. She hoped he could hear her. Hoped he would be ready for it. It’d been so long since she had a fair duel with an opponent worthy of decimating. </p><p>That’s what she would do. Decimate him. Ruin him. Leave him rendered useless for something worse than her in the forbidden forest. Something hungry, preferably.</p><p>“Thank you, professor.” She tore her eyes from Draco, who was still staring— no, glaring. His eyes were simmering again, threatening to rot a hole straight through her head. It was a look so violent she had to stop. Feet stuttering, she met that glare to acknowledge it for the promise it seemed. </p><p>Later, he seemed to say.</p><p>“Malfoy.” She shouldn’t love knowing she was under his skin, in his head. Even still. She shouldn’t love knowing exactly what that icy glare really meant. What he was really thinking. </p><p>“Hail.” Get out. Get the fuck out. She shouldn’t love it, but oh, how she did.</p><p>Such enjoyment was cut short when she turned to leave and found Harry and Ron still there. Still waiting, twirling his thumbs as if she hadn’t just been mentally wrought before an entire class. Pitying her, no doubt. </p><p>Her cheeks went hot as she remembered overhearing Harry’s thoughts just moments before. It made her want to storm out. Duck past him and Ron, avoiding the conversation all together. </p><p>She couldn’t do that, though. Everyone was still watching, and she had a point to make. Something to prove. “Harry, Ron,” she said. “We’re leaving.”</p><p>Obedient as ever, just as she guessed they would be. Whatever Harry felt for her, whatever he didn’t, she needed Draco to believe that she had Harry exactly where she wanted him. Needed him to believe that she didn’t care if Harry desired her in ways she wanted him to. Needed him to believe that she wasn’t off task. </p><p>The three of them left, Harry and Ron more than happy to rush off to class now that they felt they had insight to the Dark Lord’s plans. She allowed herself an excuse to the lavatory and the boys took their leave. </p><p>The lavatory was empty, save for the many reflections of herself staring back at her. Each one more frazzled then the last. She hated him for it. He got to mask everything so easily. She thought of his face in class as she stared at her own. Void of any sign he’d been hissing at her even as she tore through his thoughts. </p><p>The only thing out of place after the fact, his carefully hidden rage. Sure, she saw it in his eyes, his fists shaking imperceptibly at his side. Of course, the class hadn’t just been in the mind of Malfoy himself, and were therefore, none the wiser.</p><p>Now, here she was. Eyes twitching, hair standing on edge, and a redness splotching across her face and chest. Embarrassed past her wits end that Draco heard any of what she’d thought. She should hardly be the ill about it. </p><p>After all, she knew Draco was aware of their…relationship. The one she was supposed to be designing to use against Harry. Curses. Now everything was a mess again inside her head. He’d gone in and moved everything around so carelessly. Chucking things over his shoulders like boxes, stomping about in back of her mind like a deranged psychopath. </p><p>Conjuring up her very private thoughts. She felt violated, really. Draco had no right reading those thoughts in class. He certainly had no right to the night before either. </p><p>Nora reckoned it didn’t matter now. Let him think her a whore. She didn’t much care what his perception of her would be after the war anyways. They were on very different sides and when he and his family were locked away in Azkaban, she would be here. Piecing Hogwarts back together like herself in the mirror now.  </p><p>She pulled her hair up, deciding she had her fair share of distractions for the day. However, assessing herself only brought up different distractions. Very vain and humiliatingly prideful distractions. What was it Draco had said? About her being no better than Granger? </p><p>Surely he didn’t mean that. Her hair was much more tamed and while she did have a few mousey features, she certainly didn’t have Hermione’s ‘bookish’ build. Nor did she dress as conservatively. It was a materialistic comparison, one she should be proud of. Hermione was beautiful, radiant even. </p><p>So why did she feel so…put out about this. </p><p>Oh. She watched the face she’d worked so hard to flush back to life crumple again. It had to do with Harry, obviously. It was always Harry, wasn’t it? Did he find her no better than Granger, too? </p><p>His thoughts were a bit more reserved than hers. Actually, if she were being honest with herself, after hearing Harry’s thoughts, it didn’t seem he fancied her very much at all. </p><p>“Boys,” Nora sighed, dejected but not entirely defeated. She wasn’t startled when Moaning Myrtle appeared in the mirror behind her. Found the girl’s ghost comforting, really.</p><p>“Daft,” Myrtle replied. Her phantom chin came to rest on the top of Nora’s head. “All of them. Just daft.”</p>
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<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Liar, Liar, Liar</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Suggested Soundtrack: Ruelle- Until We Go Down</p><p>"I suffered all evening, all night, I'm partly suffering now as well." -Fyodor Dostoyevsky, from The Adolescent</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Curse you,” she muttered to no one in particular. </p><p>Said it just because she was bitter and cold and missed her bed. Nora was miserable to the highest extent of the term. Patrolling sucked. Boots caked with mud, shivering in the forbidden forest despite having cast both a warming and drying charm.</p><p>Half the week had come and gone on a brisk and unkind September wind. With it left the sun from the sky. In it’s place, an awful aching sort of rain. Though she’d deny it to anyone who asked, her chills had nothing to do with the weather. Not that anyone would. Not out here while she was seemingly alone amidst the trees and fog. </p><p>The lace of her shoe snagged on a root and she jumped. Swiveled, wand ready out of instinct. Of course, there was no one there. Just woods, a moon shrouded by more woods, and a lone spider. </p><p>“Hello there,” Nora said to the spider, allowing it to leave its web for her knuckle. Every drop of dew shone blue under the full moon’s light. “Sweet, hungry spider. They just don’t understand you, do they?” </p><p>It did not greet her back, which she decided was fair as she squashed it between her thumb and first finger.</p><p>She would have to be stupid to think she were alone in the forest. And stupid Nora was not. At times a little dim, perhaps. That much she could admit, because she was nothing if not honest. </p><p>Well. Maybe not that either. Nora had far too many secrets to be considered an honest person. Liar, she thought. It sounded almost exciting in some odd juvenile sort of way. Had a nice rebellious ring to it. Liar, liar, liar… </p><p>“Couldn’t convince Potter to sneak out for you, huh?”</p><p>Nora practically sprang from her thoughts as she turned towards his voice. Draco was stood against the trunk of tree a few down from where she was turning about in bored little circles. Overturning rocks and crushing tiny, innocent insects. </p><p>“If it’s the explicit details you want, Malfoy, you’ll have to ask nicely.” It’d been a few days since their Legilimency acts, but she was still properly mad about the whole thing.</p><p>“What’s that, half-wit?” He sniffed, picking at the sleeve of his jumper. Annoyed, as per usual. </p><p>“I said,” Nora cleared her throat. “Mind your fucking business, you insolent ass.”</p><p>“If I were you, Hail,” he warned. “I’d start watching what tone you use with me. Who knows what I might do to shut that mouth of yours.”</p><p>“Yeah? And if I don’t?” She forced a laugh at him. “I assume your father will hear about it?”</p><p>It appeared that the mention of his father was just the nerve to pick at. Had him up and off the tree in no time, disturbing the smog around his silhouette with pissy huffing. “I said,” Draco mocked her. “Mind your filthy mouth, before I—”</p><p>He broke off, the jut of his chin profiled in the moonlight as he twisted in the opposite direction. Drawing his wand and pointing a silent lumos at something she couldn’t see. Draco said not a word more. Gave her no indication as to what the sudden disturbance was. </p><p>“Malfoy?” Before she could move to get a better look, he was sprinting straight into the thick of the woods. Half a nervous heartbeat later, a branch snapped from somewhere behind her and she found herself running too. </p><p>“Malfoy, wait!” Leaves died beneath her heavy footfalls as she chased after the blinding glare of his platinum hair against the light from his wand tip. </p><p>Merlin, was he fast. Draco was dodging tree after tree, ducking under low hanging limbs, and she was reminded that he used to play Quidditch. That he wasn’t half bad at it either. The burning in her shins also reminded her that she had never been one for physical activities. Nor was she particularly built for running through the woods at all. </p><p>That ringing in her ears was back. Missing, missing, missing, it soared across her head like a curse. Nora gasped, shocked still by a hoard of dementors, and stopped her pursuit atop the hill Draco managed down in seconds. </p><p>“Malfoy! Behind you!” She steadied her suddenly slack knees against a nearby tree. Shoved herself against it so roughly the bark took skin off her cheek. Draco was still steadfast, ignoring her warning and chasing after something she couldn’t quite make out. </p><p>“Draco!” Nora tried again. Watched his feet jamming into the ground, forcing himself to a halt. The jerk of him turning back, turning away from not something but someone. Some figure curling in on themselves, any identifiable features lost in the distance between them. All but their robes, she noted. Hogwarts robes and although the house colors were indecipherable, it was clear they were a student.</p><p>“Expecto patronum!” Draco shouted, voice louder than she’d ever heard it. </p><p>With hardly any time to register that his wand was pointing in her direction, she ducked instinctively, wand-hand over her head. A white light erupted from his direction. Erupted and sputtered and disappeared. She met his line of sight, thought she might have seen the exact moment the horrific realization dawned on the both of them.</p><p>Draco couldn’t produce a patronus. Even worse, Nora had never tried. Never needed to and certainly wasn’t sure how. </p><p>Supposing now was as good a time as any, she left her refuge behind the tree with her wand out before her. Aiming for the swirling pit of shadows in the sky, but too distracted by the dementor at her shoulder. At Draco screaming something unintelligible, something leaking into his voice that sent a chill down her spine. The spell never made it out. </p><p>The nearest dementor descended upon her, meeting her dwindling courage straight on. Stealing the breath from her mouth with an ease that turned her stomach upside-down. Before she could rip herself away, there was a wail—her own, she realized as the thing entered her mind. </p><p>The front of her skull might as well have been cracked down the hairline. Splitting along her brow bone, splintering at the temples. Bleeding hell. It was enough to make her cry out. She did so loudly, her own yelp lost in the howl of the dementor. </p><p>She grit her teeth as the pain wracked its way through her, distorting her vision. Reducing it to little more than a weak outline of Draco and terribly large black splotches. The sharp metallic tang of blood in her mouth distracted Nora long enough for her to remember that she should be shouting something, a spell, one to tear her from the dementor’s grasp.  </p><p>“E-expec…” Nora coughed, all the air still gone from her lungs. “Ex…Expecto pat—” She couldn’t breathe, couldn’t draw the breath in to get the damned spell out. </p><p>“It’s no use now.” Draco appeared, this time the outline of him breaking between the dementor and herself. She found that she was not grateful, for the look in his eyes told her not to be. Instead she was terrified, shocked cold when he angled his body over hers. </p><p>She was terrified as he straddled her legs and gripped both sides of her face in his hands. Calloused and cold. Terrified of nothing but him as he came down to hover over her mouth with his. Blonde hair fell across his glare, the wicked shadows behind him closing in on them both now. The sight of him like this would haunt her forever. Eyes wide open, she could only stare. Breathless and afraid. </p><p>He said with equal distress, “I’ll be damed if you’re the last fucking thing I see.”</p><p>Those words struck home, clearing some of the fog in her brain. Nora understood exactly what he was about to do and she hated him for even considering it. That snogging would save them from the dementor’s kiss. Hated him for every breath they’d already shared in the passing seconds. Hated him for the fact that he was probably right. For the way he was scowling at her mouth.</p><p>Thinking she might be faster than him was her first mistake. They were on the verge of overstepping—teetering on the edge of rivalry and something worse—when she finally regained her senses. She made to say something foul, but found her fate sealed too soon, too quickly. His eyes closed shut as the howling started up again and he drew in air as if he were preparing to drown. As if it were indeed his last. </p><p>Leaning up was her second mistake. Startled beyond all reasonable thinking, she stuttered and Malfoy stole whatever it was she had been about to say from the tip of her tongue with his teeth. She gasped, a sound he took advantage of with his own scathing tongue. </p><p>Eyes still opened, she watched as his brows cut upwards in a grimace. Perhaps frustrated she wasn’t as willing to save their souls— not if this was what it took. Draco didn’t care. He swallowed her only breath with the sharp turn of his head with something that felt more like a bite than a kiss. </p><p>Resulting in a painful collision of their heads knocking back against the ground, mouths never parting from one another. A caution only Draco heeded. He held that vitreous edge between them in his hands, her face there too. She could feel him judging the height of it, the extent of the damages to his pride as his lips moved against hers. </p><p>Before he could take that edge and decidedly toss them over it, she latched on to those frozen palms and attempted to tear them away from her face. Shoved him with such an unrelenting wildness that he cursed into her mouth. </p><p>When he came diving back in, she struck his chest and bit down on his bottom lip. Hard enough that when he escaped her, seething mad from the looks of him, she saw blood welling up across his swollen, chapped lips.</p><p>“Stupid cunt,” he snarled, pale hand swiping at his chin. Creating an angry red streak above his jaw. “So ungrateful. This is sparing your life too.”</p><p>“I’d rather die,” she swore. Their eyes met, unwavering in their aversion for the other, neither willing to compromise. </p><p>“Do so on your own damn time.” Draco cleaned his teeth, spitting the excess blood to the side of her head. “For now,” he said, trapping both her struggling wrists above her head. “Lie still and shut the fuck up.”</p><p>“Look at yourself, Malfoy,” she sneered, twisting away from his chasing mouth. “Not so against whoring now, are you? Or is it just that you’re turning soft for—”</p><p>“Don’t,” he snapped at her, wrapping another hand around her neck. “Don’t you even suggest it, Hail.” He held it there like a vice, earning a strangled cough from the back of her throat. Effectively cutting off the rest of her curses. She could feel him shaking with the effort to restrain from strangling her then and there. </p><p>“Just so we’re clear, you couldn’t disgust me more,” he told her. The tips of his fingers dug into her jaw arduously, and Nora didn’t blame him for wanting to kill her. She couldn’t count the ways she’d torture him as well if given half the chance. </p><p>“Likewise.” She said, knowing killing was off limits to them both. Least they wanted to answer to Voldemort himself. Such was something Draco was likely contemplating the consequences of. </p><p>Rather than clawing at him, she raised her chin in a silent dare and hoped he could recognize it for the threat it was. He couldn’t possibly though, because he was no longer looking at her. Draco had risked a glance upwards, the alabaster expanse of his throat reflective in the moonlight. </p><p>She stole a glance too, chilled to see what was now a storm of dementors. Circling above them and them only. Nora remembered the student left at the bottom of the hill and looked to find them absent. She loosed a breath, relieved that maybe they’d had the chance to run. Jealous that she hadn’t. </p><p>“Get on with it, then,” Nora swore. With their attention returned to one another, it was clear they’d both damned the edge. </p><p>“I hope you suffocate,” he said. Well prepared for the misery now, she allowed him closer, his face near-wincing in disdain his entire way to her lips. She was waiting for him, for her chance to ruin him.</p><p>“You first,” she said to him. Malfoy—her enemy suddenly turned perfect company. Oh, she was going to make him hate this. For Nora refused to suffer alone.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This fic takes place roughly around the time of Half-Blood Prince, with bits of Order of The Phoenix and Deathly Hallows throughout. I also intend on adding a lot of my own plot, too. xxx ;)</p></blockquote></div></div>
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